All of us have, to some degree, the 8 traits from my post “Meeting children’s needs”. We are all sensitive, adventurous and wise. At the same time, we require some degree of noise, independence and order. We are loved / lovable and skilful. Even though all these traits are present, only a max of 2 really define how we should show up.
When we are toddlers, truly little programming has taken place. The older we get, the harder it is to know what our true self is and what programming is. A Soul Realignment session helps you get back to who you truly are.
As I mentioned, children are absolutely true, especially when they feel relaxed and protected. If you are still not sure which trait best fits your child, maybe it is because he/ she has 2 main traits. These can sometimes seem contrary to each other.
In this post, I will discuss sensitive children that have a second trait, for example, sensitive noisy children.
Sensitive noisy children
A sensitive child that is noisy will need to express feelings openly. They will be extremely loud when they do not feel validated. These are the future love-story writers… not that that is exactly what they will do but you get the picture.
If you block their ability to express feelings openly, they may become the complainers and suffers of tomorrow. When validated, they will have the most interesting information for you about how you or other people are showing up. They might tell people truths that leave you feeling a bit embarrassed. Remember they will only share what is needed for the greater good. That won’t be the case if you block them! If you don’t allow them to express themselves freely, then you must police them all the time! Because as soon as they have a chance they are going to spill the beans and it will be ugly.
Sensitive independent children
Sensitive children that need their freedom (independent) will love being with you, but not always. They can be distant and in the next moment be charming and loving. It is as if they have double personality, but they don’t! They just like to experience life their way at their pace. This can mean doing things with you or being alone in their room. They like being alone and thinking about life. Respect that! Don’t think that they need you because they are depressed nor hiding. They are just dealing with their emotions and doing it their way and in their time.
Sensitive tidy children
Sensitive tidy children love decorating their room and reorganizing it according to their feelings. Their desk might be full on one day, which can mean they have a lot on their mind. The very next day, everything might be hidden in the drawers. That only means they might need some help working on their emotions. This usually means they wish to have a nice mother/child or father/child chat is required.
Sensitive adventurous children
Sensitive adventurous children need balance in their life. They feel what is going on but have difficulty expressing their feelings. This is not because they don’t feel, they just don’t see the need to share, as it is “nothing new”. A great way for them to show feeling is by doing something. If they feel like: a) running nonstop, they are hurting; b) trying to do dangerous things they feel misjudged (not fully recognized or validated); c) eating too much, they feel left out, …
These kids don’t communicate their feelings well and exhibit extreme behaviour when something is bothering them. Please see these extremes as a call for your guidance. Once you notice this call, try to openly discuss their behaviour and why it is not ok. They might even become aggressive. This might take only a few minutes to several days. Always stay present and open for discussion and allow them to come to you when they are ready. Statements like, “now I don’t want to hear it!” will make it hard for them to open.
These are the 4 cases were 2 traits, being the main one sensitivity, can make it hard to identify what your child needs from you and how to support him/her.
If you wish to learn more about your child, go to the session page and schedule the Right Attitude coaching program. I truly recommend a Family Dynamics made FUN program to evaluate your family dynamics.
Any question related to your child’s behaviour that you know I can support you with, please write to me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I will be answering it in my next newsletter 💕